Mission Accomplished

The boring car has been delivered to Adelaide.

Boring is good when you're travelling 1924 kilometres.

Boring is good when it's bucketing down with rain (as it was on the first and last days of the three day trip).

Boring is good when the roads are infested with bogans towing boats, browned off and cranky because they haven't been able to get them in the water because of the weather.

Toyota does indeed build boring cars, but reliability, comfort, and simplicity are boring, and that's OK. My $750 car didn't miss a beat. The hours put into it seem to have paid off.

And being the cantankerous old codger that I am, I derived a kind of savage satisfaction sharing the roads with cashed up bogans in their $50000 dollar SUVs towing all manner of expensive hardware. I was probably as comfortable as any of them, and 8lit/100km (which is what the boring car averaged) isn't half bad.

It actually seemed to run better the further it went. Cruising at 110km/hr was a doddle.

The audio was great. I got to listen to a lot of 70s music on cassette tapes that have been languishing in our attic because we didn't own anything that would play them. A 1996 Camry has an excellent tape player.

The HVAC system worked a treat, as did the wet weather gear (wipers etc), and now I know that there are no leaks.

The only downside was losing my banana. I had rationed myself one banana per day, but the last one was confiscated at the SA border by a fearsome woman in uniform who is a trifle lacking in interpersonal skills. The young policewoman who asked me to blow into the machine at Forbes on day two was much more courteous.

I should have eaten the damn thing in front of her. It was a very good banana.

Comparisons

Poverty pack Ambiente. Awful colour - "Midnight Sky"

Yes, I know, comparisons can be odious, but I write this for myself, gentle reader, and if you aren’t interested, it makes no difference to me.

Slightly up market "Trend"

I’m referring to a motoring comparison, that of the poverty pack ford Focus (rejoicing in the title of “Ambiente”, and the mid-range model, that Ford calls the “Trend”.

I have no idea where Ford derives their nomenclature. If there is a living human being responsible, I would apply for his/her job, because I reckon I could do it better.

The comparison became possible because she who must be obeyed (the fleet manager) allotted me a Focus Ambiente (the most basic version of the breed) to take West this week. I was able to drive this thing about 1000kms across three days.

It was instructive to climb behind the wheel of one version, whilst living with another (our Focus “Trend”) since last year when we bought it new.

The mechanical differences are substantial (different motor and gearing) and the trim differences significant. When we bought our Trend, cruise control, which I consider essential, wasn’t available on the Ambiente. It is now.

This was one of the main reasons for shelling out the extra. The Trend is still pretty basic with lots of hard plastic inside. In the Ambiente, it’s much the same, but lacks the silver highlights which are a feature of the Trend. Whatever……

Of greater significance are the mechanical differences. The Trend has a 2000cc motor, whereas the Ambiente gets away with 1600cc. Gearing is slightly taller in the Trend (2200rpm at 100kph as compared with 2750 in the Ambiente).

Whilst I’m not completely sure, I suspect that the Trend has a different power steering setup – electric/hydraulic as opposed to straight hydraulic in the cheaper version.

There are minor differences in the upholstery quality and the Trend has driving lights. That’s about it.

Translated to the driving experience, you’ll notice the more generous torque of the Trend, which becomes quite apparent when overtaking. On the other hand, the old-fashioned steering assist in the Ambiente, to my way of thinking, retains more road feel. Both versions handle excellently well, something that has been a feature of small fords for a while.

The six speed auto compensates well for the shortcomings of the smaller motor, although both versions feature lurchy transitions in the lower gears. Every now and then, the tranny dithers before selecting the appropriate gear. It’s a minor irritation.

The Ambiente seemed to exhibit slightly more road noise, although tyre fit and profile (Michelin - 205/60 R16) is identical.

In summary, it’s debatable whether the Trend is worth the extra two grand, although both versions are reliable and fun to drive. The Ambiente is slightly more economical on a long run – low sevens as compared to seven/eights.

Perhaps this is the car that Ford should have been building locally. At one point they planned to….

The Three Rs

The Three Rs refer to Restoration, Roadworthy certificate, and Registration.

All three are now complete, but it's stretching a point to say the thing is "restored". It is cleaned up to the point that it's no longer embarrassing or annoying to drive.

There are still plenty of problems waiting to be fixed, but they're all minor, and strangely, some of them seem to fix themselves once the car is regularly driven. I'm using it as a daily driver, including a recent 350km round trip along the Warrego to Brisbane.

It performed well, with the exception of getting a little bit hot and bothered driving up the range at the hottest part of the day - nothing nasty - just an elevated temperature for a few minutes.

As a consequence of that, Ive 'now included a clean and flush of the cooling system as a job to be done.

Apart from that, it's always started first time, trundled around quietly and anonymously, and generally done everything asked of it. I've also had a great time resurrecting old cassette tapes that have been in storage because there's nothing to play them on.

Given the original equipment tape deck, there is now, and the sound quality's not half bad.

The other great feature of this car is the frosty air conditioning. I swear it's quicker to cool than the units in our later model cars.

 Anyhow, to give you a better idea of how it drives, here's some dash cam -

There are an amazing number of these things still on the road, and a fairly large proportion of them are Toyota White, like this one. They are the perfect vehicle if you wish to remain anonymous, and get from A to B safely and cheaply.

They simply don't rate with car enthusiasts, and this can be a massive advantage. Despite Toyota's holding their resale well, machines of this vintage are pretty cheap, as they are now part of what might be called the bangers market.

They certainly don't have any value beyond that of a useful appliance, and running one avoids all the petrol head wankery that surrounds makes favoured by enthusiasts.

I've decided to drive it to Adelaide over Easter.

Now that should not be boring.

Agghh - Panel Work

After panel work - but before a cut and polish

There is no rush now to get a roadworthy certificate, so I'm using the time to clean up the panels as much as possible.

As mentioned before, only the roof, bonnet and bootlid were unbent.

I have a record of epic and abject failure when it comes to panel work, so I bought two rear doors rather than try to get the dings out. An exception was made in the case of the driver's side front door which had been dragged along something solid.

Each corner of the front mudguards had been buggered up by someone putting some kind of tape on to hold the broken lamp assemblies in place, and this had to be fixed. Both front and rear bumpers had all sorts of marks on them.

Driver's door before

Despite my record of past failure, the results weren't too bad. I think I have learned the technique of feathering new paint over old, but of course the age of the old paint (in this case 18 years) is always a problem. It you look closely at the pics you will see it.

Driver's door after

Rear panel before

The goal, however, was to finish up with something that I wouldn't be embarrassed to drive.

Rear panel after

More Trials and Tribulations

Rear before detailing

Whilst good progress has been made, I've fallen behind in my timetable.

Rear after detailing

I was hoping to have the old jigger roadworthy by now.

It was knocked back because - wait for it - the windscreen washers weren't functioning 100% and there was condensation on one of the rear light clusters.

This is no biggie, except that I go back to work on Tuesday, and there will be a week's hiatus (at least) before I can book another inspection.


I have fixed both issues - a blast from the hair dryer on the light cluster after dismantling it, and a good brushing with an old toothbrush saturated in WD40 on the washer nozzle did the trick, but the delay is a pain.


Most of the jobs have proved straightforward, if boring and repetitive. It is called "project boring" after all.

Because I couldn't get the roadworthy through in the ordained fortnight, I decided to cancel the registration. The previous owner was unable to get the paperwork to the Dept Transport, so I did that for her. The helpful person at the DOT explained that providing I obtained third party cover I could legally drive it to the testing station on the nominated day.

Hopefully that will be in about two weeks.

Meanwhile, here are a few shots of the work in progress.

There is always an audience. This was before dinged door was replaced.

Battery clamp now right way round

 

Boot after the dent was banged out.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

These Little things Were Sent to Try Us

This was how the bonnet stayed open.

This was often the comment heard when I was a Nasho, and the army (and various circumstances) had conspired to make life very difficult. There were many similar sayings, but this is the only one, dear reader, that shouldn't offend delicate sensibilities.

Anyhow, Project Boring continues, but the frustrations are all little ones.

There was the saga of the windscreen washers. To be roadworthy, they must work. When I collected the car, they didn't. This was because the clip holding one of the hoses had broken. I fixed that by getting a clip of similar bore as the hoses used from Masters hardware. The bit I bought was for a home irrigation system - much cheaper. It's amazing what difference an automotive application makes to a price, and the difference is always to the North.

Why the washers didn't work. (Sorry about pic quality)

Replacing this made the washers work, but the reservoir bottle had a bad case of plastic rot, so for $35 dollars I bought a Taiwanese made reproduction. This fitted OK, but I cracked the bottom of it in a ham-fisted attempt to install it. After a lot of mucking about, I used bathroom sealant to fix the leak.

The repro is on the left.

Then I noticed that the stream on the passenger's side was weak, so I tried to clean out the tubing on that side. All I managed to do was break the arm of the three-way joint. This was fixed by using the tubing from a biro, which provided both strength, and a hollow tube.

It all works OK now, but this saga used up about half a day.

Then there were the bonnet struts. Again, they didn't work, so a stout stick was used to prop the bonnet open. I found a very obliging gent who re-gassed them for $30 each. This meant removing them from the car, and re-installing them when the job was done.

Problem was, I couldn't figure out how they fitted, and which was left and right. Eventually, I found a shot I had taken prior to removal, and it all made sense. Now the bonnet stays open when it should. Good.

This pic was very useful.

Removing the decayed tint on the rear window wasn't a "little thing". It was a major pain in the backside. It had to be scraped off, after I tried every chemical made by man to dissolve it. The tint peels off easily enough. It's the glue used to attach it that's the issue. Nothing seems to dissolve it. I tried nail polish remover, thinners, petrol. eucalyptus oil, and soap and water. None worked.

At least the soap and water provided a lubricant for the scraper.

A bugger of a job

That took about half a day in the middle of nasty humidity we are experiencing right now. The various strong smells given off by this combination of useless chemicals didn't help.

So tomorrow Ol Boring goes in for the second inspection.

Wish me luck...........

Getting Started

After taking my $750 purchase to get a roadworthy certificate, I was relieved to find no major expensive barriers to getting it registered. Remember, the object of the exercise is a reliable car that I would not be embarrassed to drive.

The list of nasties -
1. 2 bald tyres
2. One cracked windscreen
3. Headlight mountings broken
4. Windscreen washers inoperative
5. Battery loose
6. Spare tyre loose
7. Steering wheel cover floppy
8. Rear window tint delaminating and interfering with vision
9. Nearside parking light not working

The items not preventing registration, but coming under the "embarrassment" heading -
1. Panel damage to every panel except bonnet, hood and boot.
2. Headlining detached and falling
3. Missing wheel trims
4. Smelly/dirty interior

I wonder how this happened. Click to embiggen. Sticky tape?

Given my proven inadequacies at panel work, I decided that simply replacing damaged doors was easier than beating out the damage and painting. The fact that this car was white helped. There are beaucoup white 1996 Camrys about.

Old mate at Toowoomba Car Wreckers quoted me $75 per door, and threw in a set of genuine (if faded) Toyota wheel trims for $5 each. The doors were relatively easy to remove and fit, although an assistant is necessary to position them before bolting them on. Long suffering daughter two helped. I told her that she was learning an important skill.

I don't think I convinced her.........

I decided against replacing the front (driver's door) because of the complications with locks. I'll have a go at panel work on this one, as the damage is minor. Someone has got up close and personal with a gatepost, and the result is a gouge, rather than a dent.

The windscreen was replaced by O'Brien's for $330, which is the maximum I'd hope to spend on any one item.

I began to deal with the trim items one by one, after swapping the front tyres (little tread remaining) for the rears (plenty of tread) before going any further. On a front-driver you always want your best tyres on the front.

One unexpected hiccup here was the fact that one of the rear wheels refused to budge, after all bolts were undone. It was rusted on to the backing plate. A thorough spray of WD 40 and a ten minute wait did the trick.

Replacement doors

The battery was loose because some twit reversed the position of the clamp - easily fixed, and the spare tyre was floating around because the aperture in which it dwelt had be dented out of shape, probably by reversing over a rock or log. One clout with a sledge hammer from above was all that was necessary.

I fixed the windscreen washers by connecting the hose that was adrift, and replacing a plastic T junction with a part from a home irrigation system.This material is much cheaper than Toyota genuine. One of the spray outlets blocks from time to time. It will need attention to be reliable.

So, at the end of one week, the scoreboard reads -

Battery and spare fixed.
Doors replaced.
Washers fixed.
Windscreen replaced.

Apart from numerous cuts on my fingers from sharp unfinished Toyota metal fittings, it's been trouble free so far. The spend has been $150 (doors) and $330 (windscreen), so it's above the magic $1000.

My bride tells me the project keeps me from getting under foot until I go back to work.

Win-win, really.....